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The Author's Corner |
Phyllis Curott
Love Spell: An Erotic Memoir
Witch Crafting
Book of Shadows
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The Love Spell: TWPT: Looking back over your life was there a turning point
that you can say PC: There were
two epiphanies that showed me I was on the right path. I wasn’t looking for
Wicca, or the Goddess, and twenty five years ago it would have been almost
impossible to find either one. I was led
to the group that would become my coven - but it was the last thing in the world
I was looking for. At least that's what
I thought at the time. But the Goddess
sent me an undeniable sign – a very powerful recurrent dream literally
manifested in front of me. It’s an
amazing story I tell in Book of Shadows, and in The Love Spell and I don’t want
to spoil it for readers, but obviously, when the Goddess called, I
answered. The second epiphany was my
Initiation, which I described at the end of Book of Shadows – an experience
that changed my life. Ultimately I would have to say that it was
the journey of my life, and learning and using the practices in my daily life
that convinced me this spirituality was full of wisdom. It provided wonderful ways to experience the presence of divinity within the world, in others and
in myself. That’s the greatest gift any
spiritual praxis can give you, and TWPT: I also want to pick up on the thread of when you decided
to pursue a PC: It always
appealed to me -- it's a career that allows me to fight for social justice, and
also make a living. I guess you could
say it’s in my blood. (And my
stars) Both of my parents were social
justice activists I've been active with
the ACLU since I was a teenager fighting my school board over a censorship
issue with the school paper I edited. I
was pretty focused on practicing law, although there were times I considered
alternatives, like becoming a union organizer or a journalist. And I've done other things, like producing independent films
for a few years. I began my legal
career fighting organized crime in trade unions and fighting for the civil
liberties of union members, and social justice really is my passion, using
whatever tools I have. I’ve been a pro bono activist attorney on behalf of
Wiccan religious liberties for a long time - I helped win the right of Pagans
to perform legally binding marriages and perform rituals in public parks, and
I've advised on scores of cases
involving religious discrimination. TWPT: Was there ever any conflict between your ideas and goals
as a lawyer and PC: For me, both
are about making the world a better place, and human beings better occupants of
that world. Law is logos --rationality,
logic and order, spirituality is eros –
the divine life force, sensuality and the wisdom of the heart . Traditionally, though justice is a woman,
logos has been considered masculine, and eros feminine. Clearly, we all need both aspects to be whole
as individuals, and we need both for our culture to be balanced and
healthy. That’s the subject of my third
book, The Love Spell, which is the sequel to Book of Shadows. In Book of Shadows I described how my
struggles to become an attorney often collided with the values of Wicca. To be a success I had to adapt to and emulate
male modes of thinking and behaving. In
some ways, that was good – it was certainly empowering to cultivate a lot of
those skills. But I also lost touch with
the feminine, with my soul, and it took awhile to realize that it wasn’t about
gaining access to the game, but rather about
changing the rules of that game. In The Love Spell I
explore that same struggle but in the realm of emotions, relationships and sex.
I, and lots of other women, have lost the fullness of our sexuality. In a real sense we repeated in the bedroom
what we’d been doing in the board room – “acting like men.” We had to be active, in charge, in control.
And we thought of being receptive as being passive. But it’s not even remotely the same
thing. This is one of the most important
themes of TLS that women in particular are really responding to - we've gotten
trapped behind our armor and we've separated sex from the divine, from our
feminine divine. Because of the culture,
both women and men dismiss a lot of powerful and valuable feminine energies as
some how "less than" or servile, untrustworthy or sentimental, when
in fact there's tremendous strength, wisdom and beauty in feminine
sexuality. We've been living in our
heads, instead of our hearts. We've confused the ability to be receptive with
passivity. Receptivity is not inert;
it's dynamic. It's the power to draw to
yourself what you desire, the ability to pull, which is the counterpart of
pushing. Without the thrust and tug,
there's no attraction, no sexual tension, and no fulfillment. One of the greatest losses I suffered, that
we've all suffered including men, was the ability to be receptive. We're comfortable identifying the feminine
with gender related terms like mothering, nourishing, cooperating,
communicating, being intuitive, sensitive and emotional, but Goddess forbid we
should say receptive. That's because we
don’t trust it, don't trust ourselves.
But how can you experience love unless you have the courage to open
yourself to receive it? It took a long time to realize Shakti’s power – to be
receptive -- is the power of drawing to
you, the power of magnetism; She arouses Shiva into motion. To initiate with the power of desire is
anything but passive. There’s tremendous
energy, movement, and power in
receptivity – but you’re pulling instead of pushing. It’s incredible to rediscover that lost
capacity, and so liberating and erotic.
Ultimately, both partners need to be able to push and pull, to tug and
thrust – that’s the nature of the erotic dance between partners, of whatever
gender. We all contain qualities that
have been ascribed to one gender or the other, the goal is to find the mix
that’s right for you, that makes you unique and whole and to have a partner
that’s a good fit for you. That's a big
part of the journey I describe in The Love Spell. PC: When I’m
interviewed, reporters so often began by commenting on the fact that I’m a
lawyer and a Witch. And I always reply
that the lawyer is the dark side. Which
gets a laugh. The fact is that when Book of Shadows and Witchcrafting came out,
I did a huge amount of national and local publicity. And I lost
all of my older, more conservative
clients. And it was a real
challenge --financially, psychologically, pragmatically. But it was also a lesson I share with people. What I have gained far outweighs what I
lost: freedom, the opportunity,
fulfillment and happiness that comes with doing what I love -- to write and
teach and travel. You can’t put a price on those things. Life is short – you should do what gives you
the greatest joy. You have to “follow
your bliss,” as Joe Campbell said. You can’t, and shouldn’t, just give up your
“day job,” especially if you’ve got responsibilities to children, or a
spouse. And you have responsibilities to
yourself. You have to keep you feet on
the ground, but you also have to keep your eyes on the stars. Use your head and listen to your heart. I still practice pro bono law, but I also
write and teach., logos and eros - balance.
And if I can't continue to be published, somehow I'll meet the challenge
of rebuilding a legal practice as a very public Wiccan priestess. TWPT: When you first started out on the Wiccan path did you
seek out others who PC: The first
few years of my journey I traveled alone.
Or rather, I traveled in the company of what I now understand was my
daemon, a male muse. He's a spiritual guide to the mysteries of a woman's soul,
her sexuality and her creativity. He
manifests in dreams, synchronicities, and also in real men. For the Greeks, the daemon was a divine
being, a messenger from God. My daemon
has always been Dionysus, the God of ecstasy, embodied by various actors like
James Dean, and musicians. He actually led me to the Goddess and he's a major figure in The Love
Spell. The Love Spell is utterly unique
as a story about a woman's relationship with her daemon, and it's such an
important and neglected aspect of our spirituality. Caitlin Mathews has a great book about women
and their daemons which I high recommend. PC: I read a lot
about quantum physics which gave me some framework to understand what was
happening to me when my journey began.
The books that I crossed my path seemed very magical in their arrival
and content. I found the Egyptian Book
of the Dead, a fascinating biography of James Dean by David Dalton, Robert Anton Wilson’s Cosmic Trigger, and to
the poetry and philosophy of the Romantics and Transcendentalists. There were very few books around at the time
– I don’t encourage people to do a lot of reading at the
beginning of their journeys – I encourage them to do a lot of practicing. It’s not about the head, about information –
it’s about the heart and transformation.
It's so important for people to learn that there are other ways of
discovering truth, especially divine truth.
But my approach has always been very shamanic - very much about personal
encounters with divinity, communing with and being guided by the Sacred. PC: The first
coven I studied with was the Mother Grove of the Minoan Sisterhood and it was
an amazing experience of love and conflict, sharing and withdrawing, devotion and drama.
We met every week for over three years and it was completely
extraordinary, utterly magical and some of the most wonderful years of my life. But instead of waxing on about it here, I’ll
just send you to Book of Shadows. I
wrote it to share the very best
experience of working with a coven, to open that world to others, to bring
people in. What continues to amaze me is
how many people tell me the book has changed their lives. That’s one of the most gratifying things I’ve
ever experienced. PC: There were a lot
of reasons motivating me to begin writing. I wanted to work creatively, I
wanted to serve my community and my spirituality, I wanted to conquer my demons
of self-doubt; and because I was meant to.
I’m always trying to
write the book that needs to be written – the book that no one else has done,
that stretches the envelope, stimulates our thinking, opens our hearts, deepens
our spirituality. And builds bridges to
the mainstream by helping people understand what we’re really doing, and why
we’re doing it. One of the reasons I wrote Book of Shadows was because no
one had written a book about what it felt like to experience practicing, or the
effect it has upon your soul and your day to day life. I wanted to write a book that would explain
Wicca to the average person who knows nothing about it, and I wanted to write a
book that would help people who were interested, who were learning from very
mechanical, information oriented books,feel what it’s like to practice. Without a sense of feelings, of emotions, of
consequences, you can’t really know the fullness of this spirituality, and so
many people are learning from books, without feedback or anyone to talk to
about what they’re feeling and experiencing.
I wanted to provide a mirror for people. On occasion there are those
who don’t like what they see. But that’s
good too. I wrote Witch Crafting because virtually every book was a
“how-to”: stand here, say this, do that, mix this herb with that oil. It was
all “Wicca 101.” And no one had written
a book that discussed the why-to. I was also having a lot of problems with the
mechanistic approach people were taking to magic, with a lot of remnants of
biblical thinking which don’t belong in this cosmology, but which actually
pervade it. I really wanted to tackle
the dogma we ourselves were generating.
I had a real problem with the so-called Threefold Law, which is not at
all an ethical precept, is actually a remnant of the biblical cosmology and
totally inappropriate for our spirituality - but that's a whole, fascinating
discussion. Chapter Seven of WC. I wanted to write a book that would get
people thinking, questioning, not just swallowing and spouting our own
dogma. And then of course, there’s THE LOVE SPELL. I wrote it for many reasons, which we don't
have time for here. But most pressing
was my sense that the world is in dire need of love. And Pagan readers are
always asking for deeper, more complex books.
So I decided to tackle what I think is the central mystery of this
spirituality - the magic of love. The
Love Spell is a memoir about a love spell that I performed that worked, and the
consequences of that spell on my life, sexuality, spirituality and my
growth. Most importantly it's about our
journey to true love -- as the greatest magic there is, and the reason that
we're here, and the expression of our deepest divinity. Like divinity, love can't be fully experienced until it's
embodied, so The Love Spell is very erotic;
it's unique, there’s nothing else like it. I explore desire, sex, and the magic of true
love, diving into the mysteries of the Great Rite, sacred sexuality and sex
magic in a very experiential way. I find it so amazing that it’s coming out precisely as the
fundamentalist right is waging a fanatical campaign of cultural and sexual
repression. Book of Shadows certainly
came in for major attacks from the fundamentalists; The Love Spell is really
pushing their buttons. And it's under
serious attack and stealth censorship.
But we can talk about that more later.
I hope people just enjoy reading it as a great, sexy story, but also
that it will help readers retrieve the fullness and freedom and pleasure of
their sexuality. That it will help them
on their journeys to their souls and their soulmates. Let me tell you, erotic writing is the most difficult and challenging, especially in the first person! That’s why no one does it! From the reaction so far, apparently I’ve got a knack for it, so it was worth the struggle. But we can talk more about that later. TWPT: Tell me about some of the folks that you met when you
first began TWPT: Tell me about your first book, Book of Shadows and
how that came to be. TWPT: What did you learn as an author from the publishing
process of your TWPT: When you set out to write a book do you have a
target audience in mind PC: I always write for my community. But I also, always, write for the mainstream
– to open the door to this amazing spiritual world to people who might
otherwise never find it. I think that's
one reason The Love Spell was attacked.
Because I've had mainstream publishers and front of store placement in
mainstream bookstores, and because of my visibility, it's drawn fire. You can't find it in many of the big chains
now. Burn that bridge between the
mainstream and the community and we're further marginalized. TWPT: Were you surprised at the success that Book of
Shadows had in the I’m
particularly happy that it continues to be a strong ongoing seller. Book of Shadows was meant to be the first in
a memoir trilogy, with philosophical/practical “guidebooks” in between. That
was the second book, Witch Crafting.
Their positive reception, especially in the press and the mainstream was
very encouraging to me - personally and as an activist. So I decided to go a little deeper into the
mysteries, writing with the idea that they hide in plain site and cannot be
seen by those not ready to see them. The
Love Spell is next in the memoir trilogy.
BoS deals with discovering the Goddess, The Love Spell is the story of
finding the God. It’s a very magical
love story; it's also a book that deals with the spiritual and personal meaning of the Mystery, the Great
Rite or Sacred Marriage and how modern relationships are actually the new TWPT: What role do you see authors performing within the
Wiccan/Pagan As far as
being an elder, like I said, I waited 20 years to write. You earn that title, and it’s given to you by
others because you’re fulfilling your responsibilities as a teacher, as a
defender of our community. And that
takes time and maturity, modesty and a sense of humor. I lost most
of my law practice when I went public with Book of Shadows - so you have to be
prepared for sacrifice as well. But I
wouldn’t change a thing. TWPT: How difficult is it to bring spiritual ideas into
the realm of words TWPT: What was your reasoning behind writing Witch
Crafting
and what kind of TWPT: Was it more or less difficult to write
Witch Crafting after you had TWPT: This brings us to your latest title The Love
Spell. You refer to this PC: A spiritual journey is the work of a lifetime, so my plan
has been to do a series of memoirs about that journey. The Love Spell is a true
story about a love spell that worked and the spiritual journey that spell
provoked. That, I believe, is unique.
It's also more than just another "how-to, recipe" book. It's a personal story written in the first
person that's erotic. As far as I'm
aware, it's the only explicit memoir written by a women that re-weaves the
suppressed connections between sexuality and spirituality. And it's packed with practical information
about relationships, science, psychology, biology, history, mythology, movies,
comparative religion, philosophy, quantum physics, magical techniques,
spiritual struggle and insight, and even some how-to! And sex, did I mention sex? ;-) I explore
something that was a real epiphany for me: that our modern relationships are
actually the new I wanted to
share the wisdom that transformed my longing into love, the kind of love
everyone years for and that we can all have.
I decided to bare my heart, my soul, my desires and experiences, hoping
that people will recognize themselves in the story, and be inspired to discover
the very best of who we are, and who we might become. Because I believe that nothing is more
expressive or our humanity - and divinity-than making love. Just like BoS, this one has been a journey of
self-discovery and change, for me and I hope for the reader. I also hope that, like BoS, they find it a
great story and a great read. And since
it's about sacred sexuality, I hope they find it sexy. It's a juicy, joyful affirmation of desire,
pleasure and our capacity to love, but it's a very honest book, so it's also
about the pain and struggle so many of us experience in trying to find and
feel and give love, emotionally, physically and spiritually. TWPT: Do you think that
your readers are going to readily enter into this When I
share my own journey, I find that it's one shared by so many other people. The things I've struggled with are also
things they've confronted. And very
often, the lessons that I've managed to pull out of those experiences are
insights people find helpful. That's one
of the reasons I write. TLS is a "guide" to the magic of love - not
in mechanical spells and recipes, but in the power of our heart's deepest
longing. It's written a bit like a
modern fairy tale, and deals with some very obstacles to love, like how the
culture colors our notions of romantic love, how our parents influence who we
long for and how we love or fail to love.
And I dealt with a very important issue that's rarely discussed - the
influence of unconscious forces on the outcome of our magic, and our lives. The things we learn in childhood, the wounds
and unfulfilled needs, are like dragons that emerge from a cave when we cast
spells, especially love spells. The book is
full of symbolism - one of my favorites that started popping up before even I
understood its meaning is the magic mirror.
As I wrote and reflected on the lessons I needed to learn about my
relationships, I recognized how our lover is so often a mirror of what is
missing in ourselves, of what we need to heal or change within, just as we are
a mirror for them. What we like least in
them, what drives us crazy is usually some unrecognized aspect of our shadow
selves. So no matter if there isn't a happy ending to your fairy tale and your
love spell -- each relationship is an opportunity to discover what you need to
know about yourself in order to be more whole, more fulfilled and more capable
of giving and receiving true love, the love that's right for you. You can't love another until you've learned
to love yourself, and you can't find your soulmate until you've found your
soul. That is the gift of our journey to love. In The Love Spell, my discovery of
the God - embodied for me in a daemon, a kind of male muse -- actually
transformed my relationship with the Goddess.
I discovered aspects of myself that I'd lost, and aspects of Her -
particularly those having to do with love, sensuality, the strength it takes to
be vulnerable, and the importance of being open - to the Divine and to
love. I realized how important polarity
is to magic, to love, to eroticism and I discovered that I had really gotten
stuck at the culturally defined "masculine" end of the gender
spectrum - working hard, controlling my emotions, being strong and
rational. I was my own white knight -
but I'd lost track of my princess. And
my relationship with the Goddess had been all Athena based. For me,
Aphrodite had been a kind of Barbie doll. Working on this book I realized that it was a
problem lots of women have - we'd forgotten how to trust the feminine, and we'd
lost the power to be receptive, which is NOT the same as passive. It's moving energy by pulling, rather than
pushing. Whether it's spirituality or
sexuality, you can't experience love if you can't open yourself to receive it.
> And in
contrast to the first two books, there's been no press. BoS is still a very strong selling book, so
the sequel should do just as well, if not better. And it was selling great - which meant that
it would continue to sell well. And the
usual practice is that hardcover books are not returned to the publisher until
shortly before the paperback is released, a year later. So something went
seriously wrong. The fundamentalist right has also been putting pressure on
stores to reduce the size of Wiccan sections and increase Christian sections. And people have been reporting from all over
the country that not only have they been unable to find TLS, the Wiccan
sections are indeed shrinking. Why is it
happening? My books have always been a bridge between the mainstream and our
community, and getting rid of it contributes to the accelerating
marginalization of our community. It's
also a dangerous form of stealth censorship -- our community has always grown
through the availability of books. One
of the things that is most gratifying to me are the tremendous number of people
I meet who tell me that they found the Goddess and this spiritual path through
my books. That was one of the purpose of TLS, and it won't happened if people
can't find it on the shelves of mainstream stores. And it's certainly true for
other authors. And, of course, my publisher is financially unable to publish my
next book if this one doesn't sell. So my future as a Wiccan writer is in
jeopardy. But
sometimes very good things come out of very bad situations. I'm like the canary in the coal mine, so I've
been staying on the road, giving a very well received talk about the current
political crisis called Sex, Religion and Politics, The Growing Threat of
American Theocracy, trying to rouse people to activism before it is too late. The theocratic agenda is very dangerous, it's
a form of fascism, and they've gained far more power than any of us
expected. And the results are already
coming home - they have for me. And they
have for many Wiccan/Pagan bookstores that have been harassed, for people who
are having their rights infringed. James
Dobson, who founded Focus on the Family which is the most powerful and well
endowed fundamentalist lobbying group, has said that biblical law should be the
basis for American law, specifically that the death penalty should be
instituted for adultery, blasphemy, homosexuality and Witchcraft. Impossible right? Wrong. Remember Bill Frist, head of the Senate.
Standing in front of tv cameras during the Schiavo tragedy and declaring that
American law should conform to biblical law? And did you ever think that 130
members of Congress would say they were born again? That's almost a third of the Congress. I was in
Dallas a few weeks ago to participate in an amazing Interfaith conference and
there were so many threats that the Dallas police assigned 4 officers to
protect us. Everywhere we went, they
went with us. Fundamentalists see
Interfaith work as the work of the Devil, and that's the way they see
us. I always get threats and nasty mail
when a new book comes out, and am attacked in their media and websites, but
there's a marked increase with the release of TLS. They're feeling their power and their abusing
it. We're in serious trouble and we need
to get active -- the only safe Pagan, or Wiccan, is a politically active citizen. I was
scared, but I'm not anymore. I'm pissed
off and fighting back; and so grateful for everyone's love and support. I feel like Paul Revere - only I'm yelling
that they're already here. It's been
incredible to meet and connect with people - this is the most amazing,
generous, courageous, and inspiring community and I love getting emails and
mail from people. I read everything I get and it makes it all worthwhile. I don't always have the time to respond, but
I've got some wonderful members of the Ara community working with me and we try
to respond. I'm reachable at
info@templeofara.org
. TWPT: Looking into the future just a little do you see
any trends that PC: I've
devoted most of my adult life to being public and working for acceptance of
Witchcraft and Paganism in mainstream culture. And there are now countless
activists all over the country and
publications, websites, stores, conferences, Pagan Pride Day, and more, all
contributing to the countless ways we in which we are better off now than years
ago. There are millions of us, many of
us are public, we're everywhere - we are far more accepted. I do a lot of interfaith work and we are
increasingly accepted in that community, and therefore more accepted by other
faith traditions. The popularity of
Wiccan books earned us the appreciation and respect of the publishing world -
the dollar speaks louder than anything in this culture. And of course, there's been tons of pop
culture stuff with lots of positive, though often silly, images of
"Witches." But I've also seen
a radical turn to the far right - in the media and the coverage we are no
longer receiving, in publishing, in the courts, in the workplace, and in the
broader political currents that affect all Americans. But this community is in particular jeopardy
from a fascist movement that truly believes that anyone who isn't with them is
working with Satan. We're in danger of
becoming the new Jews in a fascist culture that's hiding behind red, white and
blue bunting and religious platitudes. We need to be vigilant, we need to be
active, we need to speak up, we need to support each other, and we need to
participate in the broader discussion of true moral values. And here's a another reason why that goes far
beyond our petty, and not so petty, human concerns: 50% of all the species of
plants and animals will be gone by 2050 - that's a terrifying prospect and we
can't allow it to happen because we were naïve or in denial or too busy. TWPT: I always like to close out my interviews by leaving
some room to let TWPT: Thanks so much for talking to me about your writing and what's happening in your life and I wish you much success with your new book as well as the books that you have yet to write. |